The Season

I’ve been hearing the phrase “this season of life” a lot lately and I’m wondering if I’m not alone here. Does everything seem to be a constant stream of overwhelm? Now, I do have two littles, a business I’m growing, maybe a couple more I’m dabbling in, a house to keep up with, trying to stay hydrated and workout, and still be a good wife, friend, daughter. That should be enough for anyone to keep their head spinning I would think. Yet, why do I feel like I’m immune to the effects of having too many plates spinning?!

Last Friday I had a doctor’s appointment for my youngest. Just a routine well-check (with no shots thankfully). My PLAN was to take him to the appointment, grab lunch, take him to daycare later and then go to work with a client. Now what actually happened was that we were running late (per usual) so then the doctor’s appointment ran late which put us to daycare after grabbing chic-fil-a. We got to daycare riiiight at nap time. Now, my buddy was full and tired so he would be the ideal candidate for a solid nap EXCEPT he was already accustomed to being with mom all day and was not having it. We walked in, he started to pitch a fit that he just wanted to go home with momma, and all I could think about was that we were going to disrupt everyone’s nap and piss off the teachers. They would be nice about it I’m sure, but I knew. SO we left.

At first I was in a little panic because I was already late to my client’s house. But I had to check in with myself on where I was needed the most. My client was super understanding and had some hiccups that day of her own. I also JUST had a Monday cancellation and she was game to reschedule. THE RELIEF.

I put so much pressure on myself to keep the day smoothly. To show up for everyone, especially my clients. But I realized that I needed the day off with my buddy as much as he did. When we went home, it was just pure joy. We didn’t do anything spectacular, just relaxed at home after lunch. Exactly what we needed.

Then I got an exciting idea- let’s pickup the oldest before he has to go to after-school care. Get in the carline! Now this may seem like nothing to most but I have always wanted to pickup my kids at 2:45. To be finished with work in time. To be available and have fun snacks ready and enjoy the time without trying to cram in homework, dinner, bath time, and bedtime within a span of merely hours in the evening on top of me still usually working on invoices, planning, and scheduling.

It was the best. His first day as a car-rider. You should’ve seen the smile on his face. Now of course he wants to be a car-rider all the time but we are going to settle with once a week until I can design our life around everyday.

Here’s the thing I’m learning. I can re-design my life anytime. Whenever I need to. Everything is always changing, evolving and growing. My kids especially. I left my career in forensics so I can have more flexibility to be with my family. To be more present and soak up the moments. ONLY to actually create another job for myself that is also 24-7 that I struggle to turn off. Do I have more flexibility since I’m the boss? Yes, I do. But it is so easy to fall in a mindset of constant productivity or it’s not successful.

So this is a check-in. I’m making changes and refocusing my gaze on what it’s all REALLY about. I love my business and that I’ve built something from scratch. And I will continue to nurture it and help it grow into whatever it will be. But the most important thing I need to pour into is my family. And I feel more aligned than ever when I focus on them.

You should check-in with yourself too. What is working for you and what isn’t? What do you need to change, adjust, and eliminate? It can be so difficult to change but if it’s moving you closer to the life you want (even if it feels so small), why wouldn’t you want to try?!

Here’s to Monday.

((I typed most of this while my 3 year old sat in my lap before the sun came up… can’t get mad at it ❤ ))